Feel Better About Yourself

There’s nothing I love more than making fun of stupid people. Looooooove it. It just gets me all giddy to know that no matter how bad things are, I’m a lot better off than 99.9% of the people out there. What’s even better, there are several sites out there that help me get my superiority fix on… check ‘em and start feeling better about yourself today!

via LATFH: “I see you’re marveling at my grosstee—my gross goatee. Yes, it’s wonderful. A lot of people actually consider me a pioneer in the art of parfaiving—parfait shaving.”

Look at This Fucking Hipster
www.latfh.com

LATFH is a super cool site. What, you’ve never heard of LATFH? God, you’re.. like.. super lame. I’m not sure I can even be seen in same atmosphere as you. Excuse me, I’ve got some blow and PBR’s waiting for me. Smell ya later.

Get it? That was me pretending to be a hipster. That’s how hipsters talk. How do I know? I have the dubious pleasure of living New York City where we breed hipsters at about the same rate as rats. Come to think of it.. the similarities between rats and hipsters is kinda amazing. They both smell, breed diseases and if you’re not careful, they’ll crap on your shoe while you wait for the subway. God, I hate hipsters. And rats.

Actually, the rats not so much.

People of Walmart
www.peopleofwalmart.com

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!

Wow. I’m mean.. good God. I think what I like best about this site is that it covers the entire country. A whole nation of fat, retarded and decision impaired Americans shopping for all their inane needs in one place. Walmart. This site is like a little steamy slice of Americana. And by steamy slice I mean cat poo covered in burnt hair. What’s also great about this site is the shear volume of updates. After all, there are like 4 million Walmart stores around the country. That’s a lot of… well.. whatever “that” is. Be afraid. Be very, very afraid.

Filed by Mr. Joshua at October 17th, 2009 under Sh*t List